I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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