Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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