SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
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She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
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Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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