We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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