Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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