its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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