i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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