Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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