I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
