I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
