Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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