fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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