i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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