What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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