Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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