No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
