if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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