I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
this will be a night to untag.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
