For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize