if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.