i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
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