Where are you?
In a non slutty way
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize