dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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