so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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