i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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