i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"