why didn't you poke me back
so that wasnt chicken after all
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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