Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize