Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
