I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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