**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
