absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
