yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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