The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We left an ass print on the piano.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Pants are for mortals
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
