Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
