Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize