i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
it's like heaven, but drunker
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
