Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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