Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
3 2 1 whiskey
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
