Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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