Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize