I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
