it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
