i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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