Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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