Your tits are I can't wait for
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
