If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to swaddle you in tequila
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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