just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
