i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
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