I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
