Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize