the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
