..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
